It didn't take 30 seconds after the shootings by the madman in Arizona before people started placing the blame on everyone and everything except the shooter. We are a world of irresponsible and illogical humans. Jared Loughner himself plead not guilty despite numerous eye-witnesses and video footage capturing the murder of innocent people. He may be complicit in the murders, but both he and certain members of society want the guilt shared with Sarah Palin, Christians, Tea Partiers, Loughner's parents, friends, the authorities, classmates and even the gun itself.
If blame is to be laid on anyone and anything remotely connected with acts of evil, then let's blame....
The pencil for mipselled words.
The car for drunk drivers.
The spoon for making Rosie O'Donnell fat.
Hawaii for not producing a valid birth certificate for our President.
The hammer for smashed fingers.
The parachute for skydiving accidents.
King James for authorizing an English version of scripture that no one can agree on.
Thomas Edison for the high cost of our electricity bill.
Ray Kroc for America's obesity.
The school teacher for failing grades.
The coach for lost games.
Minoru Yamasaki for those who died in the World Trade Center.
God for allowing evil to start with.
Of course, if we're going to blame people and things for the way they were misused by others, we ought to give credit to those people and things that have done good.
The pencil for it's contribution to literacy, math, and art.
The automobile for making it possible to commute to our jobs and to visit loved ones.
The spoon for feeding starving children.
Hawaii for romantic vacation destinations and the popularity of Spam.
The hammer for driving nails that hold homes together.
The parachute for giving soldiers the ability to attack behind enemy lines.
King James for a poetic and accurate translation of ancient scriptures.
Thomas Edison for not having to use lanterns and candles to light our homes...and so much more.
Ray Kroc for the Ronald MacDonald House and hundreds of millions in charitable giving.
The school teacher for educating our children, and us.
The coach for inspiring teamwork and teaching life habits that lead to success.
Minoru Yamasaki for designing the tallest and largest office building in America which in turn employed thousands of Americans in hundreds of businesses.
Finally, we need to give God credit for giving us brains, even if we don't yet know how to use them.
When I make wrong or stupid choices, the responsibility lies solely on me. It's not the bank's fault that I'm in debt; it's my own greed. It's not the creditor's fault when I'm behind on my payments; it's my character that is in question because I promised to repay money they advanced me. It's not my employer's fault that I don't earn what I think I'm worth, it's mine for not doing the work that earns the wages I want and expect. If my kids struggle in school, it's my fault for not being more involved in their homework or finding them the help necessary to succeed academically. When I stand before God, I do not have to give an account for the wrongs of others, but I do for my own. He will not accept my passing the blame on others for my own sins...and I'm tired of hearing others blame me because I'm a white conservative Christian male and fall into their catch-all fault depository.
Can America's Rich Solve our Poverty Problem?
Recently I've been in a discussion with some friends from the wrong political party about whether taking the money from the wealthy and giving it to the poor will actually eradicate poverty in America. I thought that using sound logic, in the form of math, would demonstrate the error in their thinking. No such luck. But after spending so much time researching the facts, I thought I'd post it here for more open-minded and logical readers to consider.
Facts:
According to Forbes Magazine, there are 385 billionaires in America. Their net worth (not income) is $12.93 trillion.
According to the Wall Street Journal, there are 2.5 million millionaires in America. This includes the 385 billionaires mentioned above.
The combined net worth of all millionaires (including billionaires) in America is $32.7 trillion.
According to statistics on the Internet, anywhere from 14-16 million Americans are unemployed.
The IRS collects about $2.4 trillion a year in taxes, after refunds. (IRS.gov)
The top 1% of wage earners pay 33% of the taxes collected. ($792,000,000,000 annually).
The top 5% of wage earners pay in 53% of the taxes collected. $1,272,000,000,000 annually).
The top 10% pay 65% of the taxes collected. ($1,560,000,000,000 annually).
The top 25% pay 83% of the taxes collected (taxesandgrowth.ncpa.org) $1,992,000,000,000 annually).
The top 50% pay 96% of the taxes collected (IRS). ($2,304,000,000,000 annually).
The bottom 50% of wage earners pay 4% (IRS). ($96,000,000,000 annually).
According to a study done by the University of Michigan, 32.3 million Americans (including children) live in poverty.
Poverty is defined as $11,161 for a single adult; $14,361 for a couple; $14,787 for a single parent.
Included in this figure are college students and retirees who work part-time, (but no numbers were available.)
According to the U.S. Census Bureau, only 2.2% of Americans are chronically living in poverty.
Out of the 32.3 million Americans in poverty, 675,867 are chronic (never move out of poverty).
According to the U.S. Census Bureau, there are about 307,212,123 people living in America (including children)
There are 117,538,000 households in America.
There are 99,270,000 people employed in America.
These employed people earn an average of $49,777 annually. (real median income)
According to the Small Business Association, about 44% of the jobs in this country are created by small business. The other half are employed by major corporations.
According to www.taxesandgrowth.ncpa.org, the cost to businesses for compliance to the federal income tax was $148 billion. (just throwing that in since corporate taxes are included in the $2.4 trillion the government takes in every year.
A true story. My daughter, who is 19 years old, recently quit college so that she could find a full-time job to help pay her bills. She currently works 30-35 hours per week at a restaurant in Garner. Her best night to date was $105 this past Sunday. On Monday she made $15.00. On Wednesday night she made $13.00. Her typical Friday/Saturday income is about $60 for the two shifts. Her average week she might earn $150.
Laura’s rent is only $150 per month. She shares a home with four room-mates. Her auto insurance is $75.00 per month. Her share of utilities is $40 per month. Laura’s disposable income for food, clothing, gas, prescriptions and necessities is about $335.00 per month. I contacted the Wake County social services office to see if Laura qualifies for any assistance until she can find a job that produces more income. According to them, she might qualify for $118 in food stamps per month. If Laura continues to earn the same amount and receives the $118 per month in food stamps, her annual income will be around $9,216.00 – assuming she doesn’t take a vacation or get sick. My daughter falls into the poverty category.
Now let’s assume that the government decides that the ultra-rich people in America – the billionaires, need to help Laura and the other 32.3 million Americans living in poverty. They start with the billionaires – all 385 of them, who’s combined net worth (not annual income) is $12.93 trillion dollars. When you take everything that the billionaires own – homes, cars, jewelry, investments, cash, etc and divide it among the people who are living in poverty, Laura’s “fair share” of that wealth is $400,309.60, putting Laura in the top 5%. That’s every man, woman and child currently living in poverty in America. The 385 former wealthy Americans are now the only poor people in America. Sounds like a good trade-off.
If every one of those poor people were frugal and only spent the national average of $49,777 annually, that money would last them about 8 years. If they’re really frugal and only spent $15,000 a year (just above poverty, but not enough to receive assistance), they would be able to survive for about 27 years…assuming there is no inflation and the cost of living doesn’t go up. Those that survived – because that’s all they’d be able to do on $15K – would again fall into poverty. The smart ones, like my daughter who is bright enough to finish college, would likely find some gainful employment after using that windfall to pay for her college expenses. Those who are not so bright will probably blow through the $400K in a matter of months and will be worse off than before they had the money stolen from the wealthiest Americans.
But there’s a problem. The taxes once collected from the top 1% of Americans would decline by 33%.. or about $792 billion a year. The IRS would be forced to increase taxes on the rest of us to make up for that difference. With only a little over 99 million Americans working, that deficit would cost each one of us an additional $8,975.52 per year. But that’s not fair! Why should the rest of us pay another $9K per year in taxes? Tax the rich – the millionaires (since there are no more billionaires in America). At this point no one is living in poverty any longer, but there are still as many as 16 million Americans unemployed. Their unemployment will soon run out because the government cannot afford to continue to pay them.
Here we go again: Subtract the $12.93 trillion already stolen from the former billionaires from the $32.7 trillion net worth of the millionaires and you’ve got $19.8 trillion remaining. These are the top 5% of wage earners in America. Let’s take all the net worth of the millionaires (not just their income, but everything they own) and distribute it among the unemployed. Now, those poor jobless people get a windfall of $1,237,500 each. But no one needs that much money. Let’s be fair and divide it among both the employed and the unemployed. At this point, we would each get $171,177.63. If we’re frugal, we can make that money last as long as 11 years @ $15K per year.
Oh no! We’ve solved the poverty problem in America for a decade or so, but now the IRS has a shortfall of another $540 billion per year. The revenue coming into the government for things like national defense, interstate commerce (the only Constitutional obligations of the federal government) has taken a fatal blow. They cannot pay for education, research and development..not to mention pay the interest on the national debt of $413 billion annually. Unless the U.S. pays the interest on our national debt, foreign nations will call the notes due and national parks and other federal and state lands will be seized to satisfy the debt….but before we get to that point –
Because the corporations that hire more than half of our workers are owned by the people in the top 5%, those businesses are filing bankruptcy and as many as 45 million Americans have lost their jobs by year two. The small businesses that once depended upon the large corporations and their employees to keep them in business begin to fold as well. The IRS finds that it cannot collect taxes and lays off the 16,000 new employees hired by this administration and the other agents as well. The government shuts down, as does Wall Street as there are no investors either. Within a matter of 12-15 months, the United States becomes one of the poorest nations on earth. All infrastructure, such as military, police, fire, EMT, CDC, the Department of Transportation, Department of Energy and all other agencies send government employees to the unemployment office, which has been closed down too because there is no money to pay any government employee. Foreign governments buy land and homes for pennies on the dollar, or foreclose to recoup loans secured by our property on behalf of our government.
Churches and charities are unable to continue their work and millions suffer. Hospitals cannot obtain life-saving drugs because the pharmaceutical companies have gone out of business. Doctors and staff are not getting paid, and creditors are demanding payment for student loans, medical equipment and malpractice insurance. Law suits have sky-rocketed as people seek any revenue still remaining. Ironically, lawyers are still in demand, but they’re having to settle for bartered goods in lieu of cash.
On a good note, we no longer have an illegal immigration problem. Illegal aliens have found it impossible to earn, (or steal), and have returned to their native countries. Tragically, our enemies have no trouble crossing our borders and use this opportunity to set off dirty bombs in some areas. Gangs have taken over most of America and fight radicals who muscle in on their territory. Innocent Americans suffer at the hands of thugs and foreigners; and from neighbors who are desperate for even a scrap of food. Those who fled to the mountains thinking they could hide from the law breakers discover that they are safe nowhere. Armies of gangs burn, rape, and pillage their way across our once beautiful nation. Not a seed is left to plant for future crops. Thousands die daily from starvation and violence. America dissolves into chaos…all because some thought that the rich did not do their fair share to help the poor.
There is no Utopia. Socialism and Communism have never worked in any culture. Greed for what belongs to someone else only makes us poorer. Far better to learn to live within our means than to demand rights that do not exist. It is morally wrong to desire to take what belongs to someone else.
Facts:
According to Forbes Magazine, there are 385 billionaires in America. Their net worth (not income) is $12.93 trillion.
According to the Wall Street Journal, there are 2.5 million millionaires in America. This includes the 385 billionaires mentioned above.
The combined net worth of all millionaires (including billionaires) in America is $32.7 trillion.
According to statistics on the Internet, anywhere from 14-16 million Americans are unemployed.
The IRS collects about $2.4 trillion a year in taxes, after refunds. (IRS.gov)
The top 1% of wage earners pay 33% of the taxes collected. ($792,000,000,000 annually).
The top 5% of wage earners pay in 53% of the taxes collected. $1,272,000,000,000 annually).
The top 10% pay 65% of the taxes collected. ($1,560,000,000,000 annually).
The top 25% pay 83% of the taxes collected (taxesandgrowth.ncpa.org) $1,992,000,000,000 annually).
The top 50% pay 96% of the taxes collected (IRS). ($2,304,000,000,000 annually).
The bottom 50% of wage earners pay 4% (IRS). ($96,000,000,000 annually).
According to a study done by the University of Michigan, 32.3 million Americans (including children) live in poverty.
Poverty is defined as $11,161 for a single adult; $14,361 for a couple; $14,787 for a single parent.
Included in this figure are college students and retirees who work part-time, (but no numbers were available.)
According to the U.S. Census Bureau, only 2.2% of Americans are chronically living in poverty.
Out of the 32.3 million Americans in poverty, 675,867 are chronic (never move out of poverty).
According to the U.S. Census Bureau, there are about 307,212,123 people living in America (including children)
There are 117,538,000 households in America.
There are 99,270,000 people employed in America.
These employed people earn an average of $49,777 annually. (real median income)
According to the Small Business Association, about 44% of the jobs in this country are created by small business. The other half are employed by major corporations.
According to www.taxesandgrowth.ncpa.org, the cost to businesses for compliance to the federal income tax was $148 billion. (just throwing that in since corporate taxes are included in the $2.4 trillion the government takes in every year.
A true story. My daughter, who is 19 years old, recently quit college so that she could find a full-time job to help pay her bills. She currently works 30-35 hours per week at a restaurant in Garner. Her best night to date was $105 this past Sunday. On Monday she made $15.00. On Wednesday night she made $13.00. Her typical Friday/Saturday income is about $60 for the two shifts. Her average week she might earn $150.
Laura’s rent is only $150 per month. She shares a home with four room-mates. Her auto insurance is $75.00 per month. Her share of utilities is $40 per month. Laura’s disposable income for food, clothing, gas, prescriptions and necessities is about $335.00 per month. I contacted the Wake County social services office to see if Laura qualifies for any assistance until she can find a job that produces more income. According to them, she might qualify for $118 in food stamps per month. If Laura continues to earn the same amount and receives the $118 per month in food stamps, her annual income will be around $9,216.00 – assuming she doesn’t take a vacation or get sick. My daughter falls into the poverty category.
Now let’s assume that the government decides that the ultra-rich people in America – the billionaires, need to help Laura and the other 32.3 million Americans living in poverty. They start with the billionaires – all 385 of them, who’s combined net worth (not annual income) is $12.93 trillion dollars. When you take everything that the billionaires own – homes, cars, jewelry, investments, cash, etc and divide it among the people who are living in poverty, Laura’s “fair share” of that wealth is $400,309.60, putting Laura in the top 5%. That’s every man, woman and child currently living in poverty in America. The 385 former wealthy Americans are now the only poor people in America. Sounds like a good trade-off.
If every one of those poor people were frugal and only spent the national average of $49,777 annually, that money would last them about 8 years. If they’re really frugal and only spent $15,000 a year (just above poverty, but not enough to receive assistance), they would be able to survive for about 27 years…assuming there is no inflation and the cost of living doesn’t go up. Those that survived – because that’s all they’d be able to do on $15K – would again fall into poverty. The smart ones, like my daughter who is bright enough to finish college, would likely find some gainful employment after using that windfall to pay for her college expenses. Those who are not so bright will probably blow through the $400K in a matter of months and will be worse off than before they had the money stolen from the wealthiest Americans.
But there’s a problem. The taxes once collected from the top 1% of Americans would decline by 33%.. or about $792 billion a year. The IRS would be forced to increase taxes on the rest of us to make up for that difference. With only a little over 99 million Americans working, that deficit would cost each one of us an additional $8,975.52 per year. But that’s not fair! Why should the rest of us pay another $9K per year in taxes? Tax the rich – the millionaires (since there are no more billionaires in America). At this point no one is living in poverty any longer, but there are still as many as 16 million Americans unemployed. Their unemployment will soon run out because the government cannot afford to continue to pay them.
Here we go again: Subtract the $12.93 trillion already stolen from the former billionaires from the $32.7 trillion net worth of the millionaires and you’ve got $19.8 trillion remaining. These are the top 5% of wage earners in America. Let’s take all the net worth of the millionaires (not just their income, but everything they own) and distribute it among the unemployed. Now, those poor jobless people get a windfall of $1,237,500 each. But no one needs that much money. Let’s be fair and divide it among both the employed and the unemployed. At this point, we would each get $171,177.63. If we’re frugal, we can make that money last as long as 11 years @ $15K per year.
Oh no! We’ve solved the poverty problem in America for a decade or so, but now the IRS has a shortfall of another $540 billion per year. The revenue coming into the government for things like national defense, interstate commerce (the only Constitutional obligations of the federal government) has taken a fatal blow. They cannot pay for education, research and development..not to mention pay the interest on the national debt of $413 billion annually. Unless the U.S. pays the interest on our national debt, foreign nations will call the notes due and national parks and other federal and state lands will be seized to satisfy the debt….but before we get to that point –
Because the corporations that hire more than half of our workers are owned by the people in the top 5%, those businesses are filing bankruptcy and as many as 45 million Americans have lost their jobs by year two. The small businesses that once depended upon the large corporations and their employees to keep them in business begin to fold as well. The IRS finds that it cannot collect taxes and lays off the 16,000 new employees hired by this administration and the other agents as well. The government shuts down, as does Wall Street as there are no investors either. Within a matter of 12-15 months, the United States becomes one of the poorest nations on earth. All infrastructure, such as military, police, fire, EMT, CDC, the Department of Transportation, Department of Energy and all other agencies send government employees to the unemployment office, which has been closed down too because there is no money to pay any government employee. Foreign governments buy land and homes for pennies on the dollar, or foreclose to recoup loans secured by our property on behalf of our government.
Churches and charities are unable to continue their work and millions suffer. Hospitals cannot obtain life-saving drugs because the pharmaceutical companies have gone out of business. Doctors and staff are not getting paid, and creditors are demanding payment for student loans, medical equipment and malpractice insurance. Law suits have sky-rocketed as people seek any revenue still remaining. Ironically, lawyers are still in demand, but they’re having to settle for bartered goods in lieu of cash.
On a good note, we no longer have an illegal immigration problem. Illegal aliens have found it impossible to earn, (or steal), and have returned to their native countries. Tragically, our enemies have no trouble crossing our borders and use this opportunity to set off dirty bombs in some areas. Gangs have taken over most of America and fight radicals who muscle in on their territory. Innocent Americans suffer at the hands of thugs and foreigners; and from neighbors who are desperate for even a scrap of food. Those who fled to the mountains thinking they could hide from the law breakers discover that they are safe nowhere. Armies of gangs burn, rape, and pillage their way across our once beautiful nation. Not a seed is left to plant for future crops. Thousands die daily from starvation and violence. America dissolves into chaos…all because some thought that the rich did not do their fair share to help the poor.
There is no Utopia. Socialism and Communism have never worked in any culture. Greed for what belongs to someone else only makes us poorer. Far better to learn to live within our means than to demand rights that do not exist. It is morally wrong to desire to take what belongs to someone else.
Every Daughter Should Be a Daddy's Girl
I have this photo of Jennifer when she was about 8 years old. I would soon turn 40. Of all of my photos of Jennifer, I suppose this one is my favorite. It's one of the few of the two of us together. I'm not fat and actually look much younger than my age at that time; and Jennifer looks happy - even proud of her dad.
This past weekend, we drove Laura Lee home to the apartment she and Jennifer shared in Delaware. It was so strange to be in the room in which Jennifer passed away. An eyeglass case, drawings by the kids taped to the wall and refrigerator, the mass of tangled wires where Jennifer connected just about every appliance in the apartment to one functioning outlet....the side of the bed where she slept, her red polo shirt on the chair I had given her. I thought that if I focussed really hard, perhaps I'd sense her spirit lingering there, because I know she wasn't ready to go as soon as she did. Instead, I felt the burning of my eyes, the urge to sob, and the hole in my heart where my daughter should be.
We said a quick and tearful goodbye to Laura and headed home, driving west to avoid Baltimore and Washington traffic. The Maryland countryside was beautiful, clean, and green. Chris Tomlin played softly over the car cd player. Pam dozed for a little while, and as I drove, my mind was drawn back to that photo from 1991; and to that impish and beautiful face smiling at the camera. Some might think that smile reflected pride in her dad, but I know that she was proud of herself for getting her way. She had my attention. Jennifer craved attention, and if she couldn't get it through her charm, she would settle for negative attention. On this occasion, she and my former wife battled for my attention, and she won. Her step-mom was gracious enough to allow her the victory and snapped this picture; and now it is my favorite photo of Jennifer. It's a picture of her before the cancer, before the drugs, the streets, the physical and mental abuse; before she had to ride the special bus to school and before the doctors decided she needed to be medicated to pay attention in class.
In the car, I talked silently to God and asked Him to assure me that Jennifer was safe and with Him. What happened next could be considered wishful thinking and self-deception, but I kind of think it was similar to what the apostle John experienced on Patmos. I believe God opened a portal between His Spirit and mine and allowed me to see Jennifer as she is now.
It only lasted a few seconds. In my mind I could see God sitting on a bench. No streets of gold or huge throne, just a bench in front of a gray or whitish wall. He looked like paintings I've seen of Jesus, but I suspect He donned that image so that I could see Him. God's - or Jesus' face was looking down. In his lap lay the head of a young woman. She appeared comfortable laying there in the Creator's lap. His finger twirled a lock of curly light brown hair. She was wearing a shimmering white dress that clung to her figure - no doubt an expensive fabric. Her skin was more golden than tan, and her face bore a striking resemblance to Jennifer's face in my picture - only a bit more mature.
I don't know if Jennifer could see me or not, but she suddenly sat up. Then she stood up facing me. As though seeing herself for the first time through my eyes, she turned to God and exclaimed, "I'm pretty!"
"You're beautiful." God corrected. She was.
She twirled around a few times, her dress flowing with her; her shoulder length curls bouncing off one another. The dress was knee length and sleeveless. Jennifer wore no shoes. Her calves were muscled and her arms were taut and strong. Neither thin, but especially not heavy, she appeared every bit an athlete. There were no tattoos, no circles under her eyes, no swollen ankles, no need for sunglasse to hide her pretty brown eyes.
"I feel so strong!" she insisted, spinning around again. Indeed, she looked as though she could leap great distances and run as fast as a cheetah. "But Father, why do I look so young?"
God reached out and touched her face near the corner of her eyes. "Because here there are no hurtful words that will cause you to cry; no pain to wrinkle and crease your flesh. Here you are safe and there is nothing to fear. Your old body began to die as soon as you were born; but this body is eternal - as I intended from the beginning."
Jennifer bent down and hugged the Father. She kissed Him on the forehead. Then she leaned with her hands on His shoulder and turned her face towards mine and smiled. "I love you Father. I love my Daddy too, but I'm glad to be here with my real Father."
The vision started to close now; but I heard God say to Jennifer before the portal closed completely, "I'm glad your're finally home too. Every daughter should be a Daddy's girl."
Jennifer never was a daddy's girl here. Oh, she was loved by myself and by a couple of other men whom she called "Dad" - because we treated her like a daughter; but she didn't really have a daddy here who devoted the time to her so that she could lay in his lap and know that she had his undivided attention. She had dads who would offer wise advice and who would worry about her and come to her aid when she needed help; but she didn't have a daddy that listened to her dreams or told her how beautiful she is. Jennifer knew that we loved her, but we couldn't take away her pain or ease her fears or protect her from evil - not like her Heavenly Father can. I'd like to think that I would die for her, but I could never raise her to life again, or give her a perfect body, a sound mind, a joyful spirit. She deserved those things. And God is right: every daughter should be a daddy's girl. Especially the Jennifers in this world.
This past weekend, we drove Laura Lee home to the apartment she and Jennifer shared in Delaware. It was so strange to be in the room in which Jennifer passed away. An eyeglass case, drawings by the kids taped to the wall and refrigerator, the mass of tangled wires where Jennifer connected just about every appliance in the apartment to one functioning outlet....the side of the bed where she slept, her red polo shirt on the chair I had given her. I thought that if I focussed really hard, perhaps I'd sense her spirit lingering there, because I know she wasn't ready to go as soon as she did. Instead, I felt the burning of my eyes, the urge to sob, and the hole in my heart where my daughter should be.
We said a quick and tearful goodbye to Laura and headed home, driving west to avoid Baltimore and Washington traffic. The Maryland countryside was beautiful, clean, and green. Chris Tomlin played softly over the car cd player. Pam dozed for a little while, and as I drove, my mind was drawn back to that photo from 1991; and to that impish and beautiful face smiling at the camera. Some might think that smile reflected pride in her dad, but I know that she was proud of herself for getting her way. She had my attention. Jennifer craved attention, and if she couldn't get it through her charm, she would settle for negative attention. On this occasion, she and my former wife battled for my attention, and she won. Her step-mom was gracious enough to allow her the victory and snapped this picture; and now it is my favorite photo of Jennifer. It's a picture of her before the cancer, before the drugs, the streets, the physical and mental abuse; before she had to ride the special bus to school and before the doctors decided she needed to be medicated to pay attention in class.
In the car, I talked silently to God and asked Him to assure me that Jennifer was safe and with Him. What happened next could be considered wishful thinking and self-deception, but I kind of think it was similar to what the apostle John experienced on Patmos. I believe God opened a portal between His Spirit and mine and allowed me to see Jennifer as she is now.
It only lasted a few seconds. In my mind I could see God sitting on a bench. No streets of gold or huge throne, just a bench in front of a gray or whitish wall. He looked like paintings I've seen of Jesus, but I suspect He donned that image so that I could see Him. God's - or Jesus' face was looking down. In his lap lay the head of a young woman. She appeared comfortable laying there in the Creator's lap. His finger twirled a lock of curly light brown hair. She was wearing a shimmering white dress that clung to her figure - no doubt an expensive fabric. Her skin was more golden than tan, and her face bore a striking resemblance to Jennifer's face in my picture - only a bit more mature.
I don't know if Jennifer could see me or not, but she suddenly sat up. Then she stood up facing me. As though seeing herself for the first time through my eyes, she turned to God and exclaimed, "I'm pretty!"
"You're beautiful." God corrected. She was.
She twirled around a few times, her dress flowing with her; her shoulder length curls bouncing off one another. The dress was knee length and sleeveless. Jennifer wore no shoes. Her calves were muscled and her arms were taut and strong. Neither thin, but especially not heavy, she appeared every bit an athlete. There were no tattoos, no circles under her eyes, no swollen ankles, no need for sunglasse to hide her pretty brown eyes.
"I feel so strong!" she insisted, spinning around again. Indeed, she looked as though she could leap great distances and run as fast as a cheetah. "But Father, why do I look so young?"
God reached out and touched her face near the corner of her eyes. "Because here there are no hurtful words that will cause you to cry; no pain to wrinkle and crease your flesh. Here you are safe and there is nothing to fear. Your old body began to die as soon as you were born; but this body is eternal - as I intended from the beginning."
Jennifer bent down and hugged the Father. She kissed Him on the forehead. Then she leaned with her hands on His shoulder and turned her face towards mine and smiled. "I love you Father. I love my Daddy too, but I'm glad to be here with my real Father."
The vision started to close now; but I heard God say to Jennifer before the portal closed completely, "I'm glad your're finally home too. Every daughter should be a Daddy's girl."
Jennifer never was a daddy's girl here. Oh, she was loved by myself and by a couple of other men whom she called "Dad" - because we treated her like a daughter; but she didn't really have a daddy here who devoted the time to her so that she could lay in his lap and know that she had his undivided attention. She had dads who would offer wise advice and who would worry about her and come to her aid when she needed help; but she didn't have a daddy that listened to her dreams or told her how beautiful she is. Jennifer knew that we loved her, but we couldn't take away her pain or ease her fears or protect her from evil - not like her Heavenly Father can. I'd like to think that I would die for her, but I could never raise her to life again, or give her a perfect body, a sound mind, a joyful spirit. She deserved those things. And God is right: every daughter should be a daddy's girl. Especially the Jennifers in this world.
Jennifer's Butterflies
There's a story behind these pretty crocheted butterflies. A dear friend from our church, Lea Eaton, wanted to do something for our family after Jennifer passed away two weeks ago. Lea is a cancer survivor herself, and has been a constant source of prayer and encouragement for Jennifer after Jennifer moved in with me over four years ago.
Lea works part-time at the y (until recently the YMCA but now just the 'y' - small letter y) and was thinking about Jennifer while she crocheted these little butterflies, which she'd intended to pass out at Jennifer's memorial service this past weekend. The deal is, once you accept one of these butterflies, you're supposed to carry it in your pocket; and every time you pull it out, it is supposed to remind you of Jennifer. It works - every time I empty my pockets, or every time I reach for my keys - the butterfly is there and I think of my daughter. Sometimes it feels as if Jennifer is nearby. It's a comforting experience.
Lea has a heart for hurting people, so when she met a young woman a few days before the memorial service who was distraught with worry about her mother's health, Lea thought "I'll bet Jennifer would want me to give one of these butterflies to this daughter." So so did. Then she gave one to a little girl who just needed someone to talk to. And another to a man who was contemplating suicide. Before the week was over, Lea had given out as many butterflies to hurting people as she did at the memorial service.
There is no shortage of wounded people in this world. What Lea began out of love for Jennifer has opened doors for God to bless dozens, and potentially thousands, of His children. It is a small thing to hold, but a huge blessing when you realize that God does see what you're going through. He sees, and He cares, and He wants to heal our worries and sorrows. Jennifer's butterflies are an immediate reminder how close God is. They also remind me where Jennifer is - with her Heavenly Father.
A Daughter's Faith, Her Heart, and Her Passion
Four years and three months ago, doctors gave Jennifer three months to live. God gave her the three months, and four more years; and for this I am very grateful Though the past two weeks have been filled with sorrow and more questions than answers, I've not once had to ask God the "Why" question. The why is apparent. It's been a looming reality for more than four years. Why is seldom the correct question. The question that I must deal with and that every person who knew Jennifer must deal with is "What now?" 
This blog will become part of the biography that Jennifer wanted me to write so that her two sons, Joshuwa Bradley and Mikil Lucus (sorry about the spelling but that's the way they were spelled on the birth certificates), would know how much she loved them. At seven and two, their memories will be few and incomplete. Even those of us who had Jennifer as part of our lives will begin to forget, or choose to forget, the tragic, yet extraordinary life of Jennifer McGarr.
As I assembled the slideshow for yesterday's memorial service, and as my wife - whom Jennifer referred to as her 'real' mom, printed photos for the collage we would display next to her urn, I struggled to comprehend how a child with such innocent eyes could witness so much evil in her short lifetime. Even more extraordinary is how Jennifer allowed those events to shape her personality but never to harden her heart. She remained until the end one of the most generous and loving persons I've ever known - even if all she left behind were a couple of cell phones and a laptop and two boys whom she had to trust to the care of her mother while she tried to get well.
I am so grateful for those four extra years that God allowed Jennifer. We may never know His purpose for doing so, but I believe we can expect to see His hand at work because Jennifer was available and willing. Had Jennifer not survived as long as she did, Mikil would not have been born. We don't know what God has purposed for Mikil, but He needed Jennifer, as sick and scared as she was, to be Mikil's mother.
Had Jennifer not survived longer than the doctors had predicted, she would not have met Laura Lee - whom Jennifer refers to as her wife. Jennifer - who was abused by so many men - found the love she longed for in the heart of another woman. That Jennifer struggled with what her faith teaches about same sex marriage in no way negates the love Christ has for her. I view Laura Lee as an act of mercy God allowed into Jennifer's life. I also view Jennifer as an act of mercy and love that God allowed in Laura Lee's life.
We may never know how those four extra years God gave to Jennifer have affected others. It was during those four years that my relationship with my daughter from my first marriage began its reconciliation. Jennifer and her brother resolved some of their differences they had with one another. My brother and I began to grow closer again. In just the past two weeks I'm beginning to see how God used Jennifer to reconcile families. It was because of Jennifer that I met my wife Pam; and it was Jennifer who became her closest friend on this side of the country.
Jennifer was so much like me: stubborn, profane, tactless, opinionated.... but at the same time, she forced me to confront my prejudices and my worldview and see things from a different viewpoint. Perhaps she learned something about herself from me. I do know that Jennifer loved me very much. I believe she was becoming more trustful of me after a few years of seeing that I was not out to hurt or to use her. While God was working changes in lives because of Jennifer, He was working in Jennifer's life as well.
The theme of Jennifer's memorial service is what helped me cope with the loss of my daughter. It's something she told me over and over again when she asked for help and I couldn't provide it: "Don't worry about me Daddy. I'll be OK. God will take care of me. He always has." Two weeks ago, four years and three months after she was sentenced to three months to live; God decided that Jennifer had done enough during those extra years He gave her. His plans for her are perfect and good. She is now at home in the only home she could call her own. She's free from pain, free from fear, free from people who would harm her and her loved ones, free from hurtful words, free from being taken advantage of, free from a broken heart over the broken relationships in her life, free from a confused mind. Free. And she's with a Father who can give her everything she needs and more than she could ever have wanted.
Jennifer possessed childlike faith in Jesus Christ. She struggled to follow scripture, but she trusted its Author. Her wounded heart was still able to hold all her love for her children, and for her family, and for people who, like her, were wounded and rejected. Everyone who knew Jennifer knew that her passion was Joshuwa and Mikil. It was for them that she held on as long as she could. Though the past two years she could only talk to them for a couple of minutes over the phone, they consumed her every waking minute.
Jennifer's body was a canvas dedicated to what was important in her life: pictures of the boys, a cross, her grandfather's initials; Woody, an angel, a penguin, a rose.... "Daddy" and "Mommy", with the initials of her wife underneath, and a quote from Tupaq "Chill and let my Father do His work". The pain from the tattoo needles soothed the pain from cancer and in some strange way helped focus her mind on the things that are eternal.
So here we are. The memorial service is done. Extra copies of the slideshow have been made for family and friends. The busyness is over, and all that's left is to watch for what God does with Jennifer's legacy and to write her story. If you were Jennifer's family or friend and you have stories or recollections you'd like to incorporate into her biography, please send them to me. You can respond here to this thread, or you can email them to me at "lmcgarr@nc.rr.com". It's going to be painful in places, unbelievable in others, embarrassing and funny and hopefully uplifting. I have some recordings that Jennifer made, some notes she kept from her counseling sessions, some memories from what she told us, two or three wills as she kept changing her mind about how she wanted her belongings shared, some photos of her at a young age and some from the past four and a half years - but few from the remaining two-thirds of Jennifer's life. If you have photos or memories, please send them to me.
It's going to be a journey of discovery - about Jennifer and about who we are. Things kept in the dark will be brought into the light so that healing can take place. Healing or justice - or both.
This blog will become part of the biography that Jennifer wanted me to write so that her two sons, Joshuwa Bradley and Mikil Lucus (sorry about the spelling but that's the way they were spelled on the birth certificates), would know how much she loved them. At seven and two, their memories will be few and incomplete. Even those of us who had Jennifer as part of our lives will begin to forget, or choose to forget, the tragic, yet extraordinary life of Jennifer McGarr.
As I assembled the slideshow for yesterday's memorial service, and as my wife - whom Jennifer referred to as her 'real' mom, printed photos for the collage we would display next to her urn, I struggled to comprehend how a child with such innocent eyes could witness so much evil in her short lifetime. Even more extraordinary is how Jennifer allowed those events to shape her personality but never to harden her heart. She remained until the end one of the most generous and loving persons I've ever known - even if all she left behind were a couple of cell phones and a laptop and two boys whom she had to trust to the care of her mother while she tried to get well.
I am so grateful for those four extra years that God allowed Jennifer. We may never know His purpose for doing so, but I believe we can expect to see His hand at work because Jennifer was available and willing. Had Jennifer not survived as long as she did, Mikil would not have been born. We don't know what God has purposed for Mikil, but He needed Jennifer, as sick and scared as she was, to be Mikil's mother.
Had Jennifer not survived longer than the doctors had predicted, she would not have met Laura Lee - whom Jennifer refers to as her wife. Jennifer - who was abused by so many men - found the love she longed for in the heart of another woman. That Jennifer struggled with what her faith teaches about same sex marriage in no way negates the love Christ has for her. I view Laura Lee as an act of mercy God allowed into Jennifer's life. I also view Jennifer as an act of mercy and love that God allowed in Laura Lee's life.
We may never know how those four extra years God gave to Jennifer have affected others. It was during those four years that my relationship with my daughter from my first marriage began its reconciliation. Jennifer and her brother resolved some of their differences they had with one another. My brother and I began to grow closer again. In just the past two weeks I'm beginning to see how God used Jennifer to reconcile families. It was because of Jennifer that I met my wife Pam; and it was Jennifer who became her closest friend on this side of the country.
Jennifer was so much like me: stubborn, profane, tactless, opinionated.... but at the same time, she forced me to confront my prejudices and my worldview and see things from a different viewpoint. Perhaps she learned something about herself from me. I do know that Jennifer loved me very much. I believe she was becoming more trustful of me after a few years of seeing that I was not out to hurt or to use her. While God was working changes in lives because of Jennifer, He was working in Jennifer's life as well.
The theme of Jennifer's memorial service is what helped me cope with the loss of my daughter. It's something she told me over and over again when she asked for help and I couldn't provide it: "Don't worry about me Daddy. I'll be OK. God will take care of me. He always has." Two weeks ago, four years and three months after she was sentenced to three months to live; God decided that Jennifer had done enough during those extra years He gave her. His plans for her are perfect and good. She is now at home in the only home she could call her own. She's free from pain, free from fear, free from people who would harm her and her loved ones, free from hurtful words, free from being taken advantage of, free from a broken heart over the broken relationships in her life, free from a confused mind. Free. And she's with a Father who can give her everything she needs and more than she could ever have wanted.
Jennifer possessed childlike faith in Jesus Christ. She struggled to follow scripture, but she trusted its Author. Her wounded heart was still able to hold all her love for her children, and for her family, and for people who, like her, were wounded and rejected. Everyone who knew Jennifer knew that her passion was Joshuwa and Mikil. It was for them that she held on as long as she could. Though the past two years she could only talk to them for a couple of minutes over the phone, they consumed her every waking minute.
Jennifer's body was a canvas dedicated to what was important in her life: pictures of the boys, a cross, her grandfather's initials; Woody, an angel, a penguin, a rose.... "Daddy" and "Mommy", with the initials of her wife underneath, and a quote from Tupaq "Chill and let my Father do His work". The pain from the tattoo needles soothed the pain from cancer and in some strange way helped focus her mind on the things that are eternal.
So here we are. The memorial service is done. Extra copies of the slideshow have been made for family and friends. The busyness is over, and all that's left is to watch for what God does with Jennifer's legacy and to write her story. If you were Jennifer's family or friend and you have stories or recollections you'd like to incorporate into her biography, please send them to me. You can respond here to this thread, or you can email them to me at "lmcgarr@nc.rr.com". It's going to be painful in places, unbelievable in others, embarrassing and funny and hopefully uplifting. I have some recordings that Jennifer made, some notes she kept from her counseling sessions, some memories from what she told us, two or three wills as she kept changing her mind about how she wanted her belongings shared, some photos of her at a young age and some from the past four and a half years - but few from the remaining two-thirds of Jennifer's life. If you have photos or memories, please send them to me. It's going to be a journey of discovery - about Jennifer and about who we are. Things kept in the dark will be brought into the light so that healing can take place. Healing or justice - or both.
Dear Jesus
This morning I pulled into a parking space at work and sat in the car for a few moments before going inside the office. I was reluctant to leave the solitude of my car for the distractions of the office. As I sat looking out the window at woods distorted by rivulets of rain water flowing down my windshield, I said a quick prayer: "Dear Jesus, please help me to know you as my best friend."
On the ride in to work this morning I was thinking about the past 57 years and how much has happened. Yesterday I turned 58 years old. So much has changed in my lifetime, yet some things have barely changed at all. For example, my perspective on Jesus has been for most of my life as a bearded man in robes who endured a cross for my sins about 2,000 years before I was born. I understood He loved me and wanted to restore the relationship between His Father and mankind; and I knew that His Spirit was sent to us as our personal Counselor to help us live the 'Christian walk'; but He's always been more Savior than brother to me, too holy and busy leading more obedient and passionate Christians to spend time hanging out with this worldly disciple.
It's only been since reading books like "The Shack" by Paul Young, "He Loves Me!" by Wayne Jacobsen, "What's So Amazing About Grace" by Phillip Yancey, and "So You Don't Want To Go To Church Anymore" by Jake Colsen that my eyes and heart have been opened to how much Jesus wants a personal relationship with me. Far from the dry pages of scripture, these books have revealed to me what Joseph Scrivens sensed 150 years ago when he penned "What a Friend We Have In Jesus." While Scrivens' message focussed on trials and temptations, he understood that Jesus was the kind of friend who was willing to walk with us anywhere if we'd just invite Him into our circumstances.
Prior to reading books like those mentioned above, I came from a legalistic, literal background, and I was afraid that if I read and accepted something that wasn't verbatim what is found in scripture, then I was risking my salvation. I'm learning better. Perhaps the book that has most affected my perception of God has been "The Shack" - a story about Papa - the Father disguised as a beautiful black woman; Sarayu - an almost physical Holy Spirit, and Jesus - the brother who loves to wrap His arms around you and lead you on walks through the woods and across waters. The Shack and these other books have challenged my understanding of what I've been taught about God for most of my life; but they ring true and because of the God they reveal, I feel as though I've found the door that allows me to have an intimate relationship with Him.
Paul warned us about telling people about God's grace and Jesus' sacrifice and then loading them down with legalism - putting them back under the bonds of the Law. The Shack succeeded in presenting the God who got saved between Malachi and Matthew. We no longer need to worry about a schizophrenic God who wavers between holy justice and conditional love depending upon our performance. Papa is not the God who takes out His wrath against mankind on the person of Jesus, His only Son. Papa is the God Who keeps a constant vigil for every lost child and who picks up His robes and runs to embrace those who come to their senses and admit that His ways are better than their own. Jesus is not the unfortunate victim of an angry Father and a sinful world who went to that cross reluctantly, begging for God to come up with another solution for saving humanity. Jesus charged directly at sin, risking His own life to save those whom God loves passionately. As Wayne Jacobsen, author of "He Loves Me!", points out - only Jesus could hold the Father's passion and the weight of all sin upon His person and bear it until the Father's passion consumed sin.
When you really understand what Jesus meant when He said that He came not to condemn the world, but that the world, through Him might be saved; you understand that God doesn't want to punish you for your sins, He's not angry at you for failings, He's not uncomfortable with your filth and scars or your low self-esteem; but He's passionately in love with you. If you understand His love, grace, and forgiveness, you no longer need to appease Him out of fear of hell; you're free to love Him. Papa doesn't want servants, He wants relationships. Religion serves, love fills the emptiness in our hearts, and allows us to see God the way Jesus spoke to us about in scriptures.
And so this morning I asked Jesus to come be more than my Savior, but to help me know Him as the friend He has always been to me. I know that as I spend more time hanging out with Jesus, I'm going to start seeing the world not through my distorted viewpoint, but through His. I may have to let go of my alter-ego, Bubba BiGot Jr, III and become a new creation in His image.
Some things change slowly, but I'm grateful that God doesn't leave us like He found us. We could 'what if' our past decisions for eternity, but thank God that He never stops coaxing us towards Him. If, occasionally, I slip up and say or do something nice or out of character for me; just know that it's Jesus putting His hands over my soulish mouth and speaking through me. And if at some point I become this totally cool and loveable guy who everyone wants to be around - just know that He's almost done with me and it's time to go Home.
On the ride in to work this morning I was thinking about the past 57 years and how much has happened. Yesterday I turned 58 years old. So much has changed in my lifetime, yet some things have barely changed at all. For example, my perspective on Jesus has been for most of my life as a bearded man in robes who endured a cross for my sins about 2,000 years before I was born. I understood He loved me and wanted to restore the relationship between His Father and mankind; and I knew that His Spirit was sent to us as our personal Counselor to help us live the 'Christian walk'; but He's always been more Savior than brother to me, too holy and busy leading more obedient and passionate Christians to spend time hanging out with this worldly disciple.
It's only been since reading books like "The Shack" by Paul Young, "He Loves Me!" by Wayne Jacobsen, "What's So Amazing About Grace" by Phillip Yancey, and "So You Don't Want To Go To Church Anymore" by Jake Colsen that my eyes and heart have been opened to how much Jesus wants a personal relationship with me. Far from the dry pages of scripture, these books have revealed to me what Joseph Scrivens sensed 150 years ago when he penned "What a Friend We Have In Jesus." While Scrivens' message focussed on trials and temptations, he understood that Jesus was the kind of friend who was willing to walk with us anywhere if we'd just invite Him into our circumstances.
Prior to reading books like those mentioned above, I came from a legalistic, literal background, and I was afraid that if I read and accepted something that wasn't verbatim what is found in scripture, then I was risking my salvation. I'm learning better. Perhaps the book that has most affected my perception of God has been "The Shack" - a story about Papa - the Father disguised as a beautiful black woman; Sarayu - an almost physical Holy Spirit, and Jesus - the brother who loves to wrap His arms around you and lead you on walks through the woods and across waters. The Shack and these other books have challenged my understanding of what I've been taught about God for most of my life; but they ring true and because of the God they reveal, I feel as though I've found the door that allows me to have an intimate relationship with Him.
Paul warned us about telling people about God's grace and Jesus' sacrifice and then loading them down with legalism - putting them back under the bonds of the Law. The Shack succeeded in presenting the God who got saved between Malachi and Matthew. We no longer need to worry about a schizophrenic God who wavers between holy justice and conditional love depending upon our performance. Papa is not the God who takes out His wrath against mankind on the person of Jesus, His only Son. Papa is the God Who keeps a constant vigil for every lost child and who picks up His robes and runs to embrace those who come to their senses and admit that His ways are better than their own. Jesus is not the unfortunate victim of an angry Father and a sinful world who went to that cross reluctantly, begging for God to come up with another solution for saving humanity. Jesus charged directly at sin, risking His own life to save those whom God loves passionately. As Wayne Jacobsen, author of "He Loves Me!", points out - only Jesus could hold the Father's passion and the weight of all sin upon His person and bear it until the Father's passion consumed sin.
When you really understand what Jesus meant when He said that He came not to condemn the world, but that the world, through Him might be saved; you understand that God doesn't want to punish you for your sins, He's not angry at you for failings, He's not uncomfortable with your filth and scars or your low self-esteem; but He's passionately in love with you. If you understand His love, grace, and forgiveness, you no longer need to appease Him out of fear of hell; you're free to love Him. Papa doesn't want servants, He wants relationships. Religion serves, love fills the emptiness in our hearts, and allows us to see God the way Jesus spoke to us about in scriptures.
And so this morning I asked Jesus to come be more than my Savior, but to help me know Him as the friend He has always been to me. I know that as I spend more time hanging out with Jesus, I'm going to start seeing the world not through my distorted viewpoint, but through His. I may have to let go of my alter-ego, Bubba BiGot Jr, III and become a new creation in His image.
Some things change slowly, but I'm grateful that God doesn't leave us like He found us. We could 'what if' our past decisions for eternity, but thank God that He never stops coaxing us towards Him. If, occasionally, I slip up and say or do something nice or out of character for me; just know that it's Jesus putting His hands over my soulish mouth and speaking through me. And if at some point I become this totally cool and loveable guy who everyone wants to be around - just know that He's almost done with me and it's time to go Home.
I Love You Daddy
This morning, I dropped my daughter off at the airport so that she could fly out to California in the hopes that the doctors at Berkeley can help get her cancer into remission. Tomorrow morning, my baby girl leaves for Appalachian State University to start college. And this past weekend at Myrtle Beach, I was able to spend time with my youngest son and his fiance.
Perhaps the thing that means to most to me is to hear the words, "I love you Daddy." Too often they're said in parting, and since we don't know if we'll get another chance to express our love for one another, it's important that those words are said.
This week is particularly tough because for my two daughters, life is about to change immediately. In a few months life will change for my son. They know that I love them, but I don't know if they understand how proud I am of them. My son has found a beautiful bride to partner with and their lives, like those of my daughters, will take it's own course. Finding someone you want to spend the rest of your life with is a wonderful and necessary thing. We weren't created to live for ourselves. I'm proud of him for committing himself to such a fine young woman who loves him back.
My youngest daughter, the baby girl who's been my constant companion every weekend since she was three, is now going to college so that she can learn how to help other children. She's grown way too fast. She's beautiful and smart and has a gentle heart under that tough facade she puts on around others. When she's with me, she likes to cuddle, and when she's able to sleep, she looks too young and innocent for the world she's about to enter. And as much as I want to protect her and keep her near, I love her too much to stifle her and hinder her potential to be all that God created her to become.
My other daughter, the one who's in stage 5 cancer, she's amazed and humbled me with her strength and endurance. When she was little, if something was hard, she would quit. Now that she's fighting for her life, she's not quitting. In spite of constant pain and debilitating drugs, she gets up every day glad to be alive. Three years ago the doctors gave her three months to live. She's still defying death, even when the reports all come back negative. She calls me several times a day, saying "What's up, you good looking man?" She shows so much appreciation for every little thing that I and anyone else does for her, for she understands that nothing is fair or deserved in this life. Every good thing is a blessing from God. This daughter has two boys of her own, and she misses them so much she cries herself to sleep each night thinking of them. She can't afford much on her small disability check, but she's always trying to find something for the boys. She'll do anything, and has done some questionable things, for them. Most of all, I'm proud of her gentle and giving heart. I'm going to write a story about her life and tell about all the obstacles she's had to overcome. My prayer is that she will be around to see it published.
Life hasn't gone the way I thought it would when I was growing up. Squandered opportunities and 'what-ifs' could haunt me to an early grave; except for knowing that everything I've done hasn't been pointless. I've got some great kids who love me in spite of the failed relationships that brought them into this world. My biggest regret is that there are three more children from my first marriage who I allowed myself to lose touch with. I've missed out on their journeys from children to adulthood; but I'm sure that I would have every reason to be just as proud of what they've become as I have in my youngest three. I can't ever hear "I love you Daddy" from my oldest children, but I can honestly say that I love them.
I pray for my kids. I'm getting worn out early in life. The time for playing catch or wrestling on the floor is past for me. Still, whenever I hear them say, "I love you Daddy", I'm drawn back to the time I could hoist them onto my shoulders, or tuck them in and tell them not to grow up too fast. I want to be a Daddy for as long as I possibly can.
Perhaps the thing that means to most to me is to hear the words, "I love you Daddy." Too often they're said in parting, and since we don't know if we'll get another chance to express our love for one another, it's important that those words are said.
This week is particularly tough because for my two daughters, life is about to change immediately. In a few months life will change for my son. They know that I love them, but I don't know if they understand how proud I am of them. My son has found a beautiful bride to partner with and their lives, like those of my daughters, will take it's own course. Finding someone you want to spend the rest of your life with is a wonderful and necessary thing. We weren't created to live for ourselves. I'm proud of him for committing himself to such a fine young woman who loves him back.
My youngest daughter, the baby girl who's been my constant companion every weekend since she was three, is now going to college so that she can learn how to help other children. She's grown way too fast. She's beautiful and smart and has a gentle heart under that tough facade she puts on around others. When she's with me, she likes to cuddle, and when she's able to sleep, she looks too young and innocent for the world she's about to enter. And as much as I want to protect her and keep her near, I love her too much to stifle her and hinder her potential to be all that God created her to become.
My other daughter, the one who's in stage 5 cancer, she's amazed and humbled me with her strength and endurance. When she was little, if something was hard, she would quit. Now that she's fighting for her life, she's not quitting. In spite of constant pain and debilitating drugs, she gets up every day glad to be alive. Three years ago the doctors gave her three months to live. She's still defying death, even when the reports all come back negative. She calls me several times a day, saying "What's up, you good looking man?" She shows so much appreciation for every little thing that I and anyone else does for her, for she understands that nothing is fair or deserved in this life. Every good thing is a blessing from God. This daughter has two boys of her own, and she misses them so much she cries herself to sleep each night thinking of them. She can't afford much on her small disability check, but she's always trying to find something for the boys. She'll do anything, and has done some questionable things, for them. Most of all, I'm proud of her gentle and giving heart. I'm going to write a story about her life and tell about all the obstacles she's had to overcome. My prayer is that she will be around to see it published.
Life hasn't gone the way I thought it would when I was growing up. Squandered opportunities and 'what-ifs' could haunt me to an early grave; except for knowing that everything I've done hasn't been pointless. I've got some great kids who love me in spite of the failed relationships that brought them into this world. My biggest regret is that there are three more children from my first marriage who I allowed myself to lose touch with. I've missed out on their journeys from children to adulthood; but I'm sure that I would have every reason to be just as proud of what they've become as I have in my youngest three. I can't ever hear "I love you Daddy" from my oldest children, but I can honestly say that I love them.
I pray for my kids. I'm getting worn out early in life. The time for playing catch or wrestling on the floor is past for me. Still, whenever I hear them say, "I love you Daddy", I'm drawn back to the time I could hoist them onto my shoulders, or tuck them in and tell them not to grow up too fast. I want to be a Daddy for as long as I possibly can.
Father's Day
Sunday is Father's Day and on Saturday I'm going to see a daughter I haven't seen since she was two years old. Now she has two children of her own. I've six children and seven grandchildren - only two of whom have ever met me. By all rights, I haven't been the kind of father you see depicted on a Norman Rockwell painting. I tried to do right by my youngest daughter, but it's been a tough and shameful road.
As I think about the ideal human father, I'm drawn to Joseph, the father of Jesus. He married a woman in spite of the shame her presumed infidelity brought upon him. He loved her and protected her and her son from those who would kill them. Joseph took his family to another country to protect them from Herod and he took a child that wasn't his as a son and brought Him up as his own. Joseph didn't own much, but what he had, he shared with Jesus. He taught him a skill that provided a profession for the young man. Apparently, Joseph made sure that Jesus was schooled because Jesus' knowledge and insight impressed scholars, even at a young age. Probably, Joseph talked to Jesus about responsibility for himself and for his mother and siblings.
We don't know what happened to Joseph - how long he was around, how he died, etc. But we do know the character of the son he raised. While Jesus was fully God, he was also fully human. He learned how to walk, then talk, then to use both hammer and scripture with purpose. Before Jesus died, He charged John to care for his mother, probably just as Joseph charged Him to care for her before he died.
Joseph was not well-known. Although his wife is revered today, Joseph is mostly forgotten. All we know about him is that he did the right things, never seeking a reputation for himself. Joseph's legacy however is the Savior of the whole world. Not bad for a poor carpenter from Bethany.
I've fathered some great kids. Although I wasn't around much in their lives, they are still my legacy and I'm very proud of them.
As I think about the ideal human father, I'm drawn to Joseph, the father of Jesus. He married a woman in spite of the shame her presumed infidelity brought upon him. He loved her and protected her and her son from those who would kill them. Joseph took his family to another country to protect them from Herod and he took a child that wasn't his as a son and brought Him up as his own. Joseph didn't own much, but what he had, he shared with Jesus. He taught him a skill that provided a profession for the young man. Apparently, Joseph made sure that Jesus was schooled because Jesus' knowledge and insight impressed scholars, even at a young age. Probably, Joseph talked to Jesus about responsibility for himself and for his mother and siblings.
We don't know what happened to Joseph - how long he was around, how he died, etc. But we do know the character of the son he raised. While Jesus was fully God, he was also fully human. He learned how to walk, then talk, then to use both hammer and scripture with purpose. Before Jesus died, He charged John to care for his mother, probably just as Joseph charged Him to care for her before he died.
Joseph was not well-known. Although his wife is revered today, Joseph is mostly forgotten. All we know about him is that he did the right things, never seeking a reputation for himself. Joseph's legacy however is the Savior of the whole world. Not bad for a poor carpenter from Bethany.
I've fathered some great kids. Although I wasn't around much in their lives, they are still my legacy and I'm very proud of them.
America's Founding History - In their own words
My friend, James M. Pratt, has assembled the collection you see above so that we all might educate ourselves about our nation's purpose.
This past weekend, my family took a trip to Gatlinburg, Tennessee. It's a favorite destination for anyone east of the Mississippi. Normally it's difficult to find a vacancy at a hotel from June until November in Gatlinburg. However, we noticed that every hotel/motel in the area had a vacancy sign lit. The economy is just one indicator that our country is in peril - but it's a big indicator because it's a reflection of our confidence in our government and in the businesses that provide the jobs and the security we all desire.
Already many politicians are lining themselves up for a run for President in 2012. Partisianship has never been more prevalent. While the politicians rant and rave and blame one another for America's woes, Americans react with fear and anger. We can't believe that we elected these people to serve us; we thought that the government worked for us; we thought we lived in a republic - government by the people, for the people, of the people. We used to. I remember when we did.
The vision that our founders had for America is not the vision shared by our leaders today. To be sure, there were disagreements among our Founders about the best form of government for a free people. We didn't arrive at our Constitution overnight. It took decades to come up with our founding documents, and those were based on thousands of years of study - as far back as Plato and Aristotle. Millions have served to protect the founding principles of our nation; over a million have given their lives for the cause of freedom.
Inside those documents are the solution to America's problems today. Understand them and it doesn't matter what party you belong to. America is bigger than any party. The economy was a factor preceeding and during the Revolutionary War as colonists rejected the high taxes imposed on the people by a government that neglected the people. We can learn from past experience, so I encourage everyone to get your collection. Just click on the link above.
I think you'll also enjoy James' latest blog post about WWII veteran Howie Beach and other D-Day veterans. Check out http://www.jmprattcom.blogspot.com/.
Crap & True Confessions
When you were growing up, did you envision your life turning out the way it did? Or did life take you on a ride through the ghettos and bypass the country clubs? When did you realize that your life was beyond your control?
Life isn't fair. Murphy is omnipresent. If you’re lied to enough, eventually you’re going to believe a lie. Good people suffer injustice, and the rights of criminals are protected by law. Even in this land of opportunity, most people never rise above mediocrity and their only footnote in history is an obituary. And that's just talking about everyone else!
I don't live in a mansion and life hasn't always been easy. Still, I've been around long enough to know that there are things that money can't fix: things like death, loss of trust, stupidity, and the government. If money could fix those things, Oprah could stay thin, Rosie O'Donnell wouldn't be paranoid, the Catholic Church wouldn't waste money compensating the victims of perverted priests, and the trillions of dollars thrown at welfare wouldn't result in more people in poverty today than ever before.
I myself came from very humble beginnings. Out of five sons, only three of us survived birth. Out of ten million sperm, I won. I’ve often wondered what I’ve missed out on had another sperm gotten to that egg first. Maybe I'd be able to sing, play the piano, paint a fractal, cure a disease - heck, I'd just like to learn to swim, but my legs and arms won't both move at the same time... Don’t get me wrong, my parents were great, but I turned out a shithead - at least in my own mind. I’ve lived for the moment. I’ve taken the smoothest route at the time - only to pay dearly later on. I’ve given up too quickly and compromised my dreams by settling for second or third best. In addition to learning survival skills, I’ve learned to wear a facade - to pretend that I was in control of my own destiny. Actually, I avoided risks; which resulted in missed opportunities. Shame became my constant companion and I’ve devoted a lot of time trying to hide him from my friends and family. I developed other skills to disguise my shame: loyalty, humor, and the ability to teach others how not to be like myself.
Not that I’ve needed help. Life throws us curveballs too. A storm can come along and destroy your home; a better qualified person can take your job; a deadbeat friend or relative can drag you down with them. Loved ones die and leave you with a hole in your heart that can't be filled. Life is full of crap, and often life gets tiring.
Skills acquired in life can, and often are, cruel protectors. Shame can keep us from knowing the difference between a values statement and an observation. My wife can say "It's time to cut the grass." but what hear is "You're a lazy, worthless slug, and I wonder why I ever married you!" What my wife meant was that the grass needs to be cut, but my own opinion of myself caused me to hear something else completely.
Yet, in spite of all the crap that comes our way, there is a brighter side to life. There is this thing called hope. It's a God-thing that often defies logic and reason. And where there is hope, there is an opportunity to learn and profit from our mistakes.
I've learned that self-discipline is a work of the flesh that keeps me from living in the grace of God. I’ve discovered that facts change depending upon my perception. I've also learned that people who tell the truth don't have to remember anything. There's a lot of freedom in being transparent, which may explain why there are so many depressed people in the world today.
There's something else I've learned: a seed grows well in crap. In fact, crap provides the perfect environment for a seed to grow into something beautiful. God uses crap to bless our lives with. An unplanned child from a broken marriage might become a daddy's girl who brings him great pride and joy. Cancer can destroy the body of a loved one, but it can't kill their spirit or prevent a miracle in the form of a beautiful grandson. Bankruptcy may destroy your credit, but you’ll find that in losing your possessions that they no longer possess you. Acquaintenances may turn their backs on you when your facade crumbles, but it's then that you discover who your real friends are.
Everyone you meet has crap in their lives. Most want the same thing you do: to be loved, valued, to count for something. Maybe you've seen someone who's going through so much crap that you're thankful for your own. We're told to get our crap together; so maybe that's what we ought to do. With all the crap in this world, surely there is enough of us to turn it in to something wonderful: a home for the homeless, a shoulder to cry on, or a cause to donate to or volunteer for.
Life’s crap can be a blessing in disguise. It may stink while you’re going through it, but without it, you can’t grow. If you’ve got crap in your life now – rejoice! Grow something!
Life isn't fair. Murphy is omnipresent. If you’re lied to enough, eventually you’re going to believe a lie. Good people suffer injustice, and the rights of criminals are protected by law. Even in this land of opportunity, most people never rise above mediocrity and their only footnote in history is an obituary. And that's just talking about everyone else!
I don't live in a mansion and life hasn't always been easy. Still, I've been around long enough to know that there are things that money can't fix: things like death, loss of trust, stupidity, and the government. If money could fix those things, Oprah could stay thin, Rosie O'Donnell wouldn't be paranoid, the Catholic Church wouldn't waste money compensating the victims of perverted priests, and the trillions of dollars thrown at welfare wouldn't result in more people in poverty today than ever before.
I myself came from very humble beginnings. Out of five sons, only three of us survived birth. Out of ten million sperm, I won. I’ve often wondered what I’ve missed out on had another sperm gotten to that egg first. Maybe I'd be able to sing, play the piano, paint a fractal, cure a disease - heck, I'd just like to learn to swim, but my legs and arms won't both move at the same time... Don’t get me wrong, my parents were great, but I turned out a shithead - at least in my own mind. I’ve lived for the moment. I’ve taken the smoothest route at the time - only to pay dearly later on. I’ve given up too quickly and compromised my dreams by settling for second or third best. In addition to learning survival skills, I’ve learned to wear a facade - to pretend that I was in control of my own destiny. Actually, I avoided risks; which resulted in missed opportunities. Shame became my constant companion and I’ve devoted a lot of time trying to hide him from my friends and family. I developed other skills to disguise my shame: loyalty, humor, and the ability to teach others how not to be like myself.
Not that I’ve needed help. Life throws us curveballs too. A storm can come along and destroy your home; a better qualified person can take your job; a deadbeat friend or relative can drag you down with them. Loved ones die and leave you with a hole in your heart that can't be filled. Life is full of crap, and often life gets tiring.
Skills acquired in life can, and often are, cruel protectors. Shame can keep us from knowing the difference between a values statement and an observation. My wife can say "It's time to cut the grass." but what hear is "You're a lazy, worthless slug, and I wonder why I ever married you!" What my wife meant was that the grass needs to be cut, but my own opinion of myself caused me to hear something else completely.
Yet, in spite of all the crap that comes our way, there is a brighter side to life. There is this thing called hope. It's a God-thing that often defies logic and reason. And where there is hope, there is an opportunity to learn and profit from our mistakes.
I've learned that self-discipline is a work of the flesh that keeps me from living in the grace of God. I’ve discovered that facts change depending upon my perception. I've also learned that people who tell the truth don't have to remember anything. There's a lot of freedom in being transparent, which may explain why there are so many depressed people in the world today.
There's something else I've learned: a seed grows well in crap. In fact, crap provides the perfect environment for a seed to grow into something beautiful. God uses crap to bless our lives with. An unplanned child from a broken marriage might become a daddy's girl who brings him great pride and joy. Cancer can destroy the body of a loved one, but it can't kill their spirit or prevent a miracle in the form of a beautiful grandson. Bankruptcy may destroy your credit, but you’ll find that in losing your possessions that they no longer possess you. Acquaintenances may turn their backs on you when your facade crumbles, but it's then that you discover who your real friends are.
Everyone you meet has crap in their lives. Most want the same thing you do: to be loved, valued, to count for something. Maybe you've seen someone who's going through so much crap that you're thankful for your own. We're told to get our crap together; so maybe that's what we ought to do. With all the crap in this world, surely there is enough of us to turn it in to something wonderful: a home for the homeless, a shoulder to cry on, or a cause to donate to or volunteer for.
Life’s crap can be a blessing in disguise. It may stink while you’re going through it, but without it, you can’t grow. If you’ve got crap in your life now – rejoice! Grow something!
No one is alone
A young man ended his life today. Though we'll never know what went through his mind in those final moments, it was an act of hopeless finality . We do know how it's affected his friends whom he reached out to just before committing the act.
I don't know if this young man understood that there was still something worth living for. If he hadn't turned his phone off after that last text, he would have quickly found out that his friends were on their way to help him. Some called 911, some jumped into their cars, and some kept trying to get him back on that phone. They all hoped and prayed they would not be too late. Now they are left with the undeserved feeling that they were too late and had done too little.
I'm certain that most parents of this boy's friends are as horrified as I am; for regardless of how we felt about this young man, we know that his death is affecting our children, and we are afraid for them. We can't understand the hopelessness and depression our children are experiencing. To us, they have their whole lives ahead of them - the chance to go farther and become more than we've accomplished in our lives.
If I could say one thing to my daughter and her friends as they mourn the loss of their friend it would be this: You're not in this life alone, no matter how it might feel at times. You are loved with a passion that would cause any of us to lay down our lives for you. You are the best thing we've ever done - you have inside you the best your mom and dad could offer.
If we've been so blind to not see what you're going through, please forgive us. We might come home exhausted and stressed from trying to make it from one paycheck to the next and not realize that you need us to pay as much attention to you as we do to our jobs. We may have left you at home to be supervised by a television; or if we've watched TV together, we may have only conversed during station breaks. Forgive us.
It is natural to want to place the blame for this young man's death on someone or something: depression, drugs, the education system, the government, the church, the media and televion and video games and unemployment....anywhere but accept our responsibility.
I met this young man briefly one time and don't even recall his appearance. Yet, he was important to my daughter. They were friends. If he was important to her, he should have been more important to me. They rushed to try to save him but were too late. Now they sit together, broken hearted and hurting and alone, and the parents are trying to give them space to grieve. I think that we should be there with our children, letting them know that they are not alone, that they are valued and loved and needed. I called my daughter and asked if I could come over to her friend's house where the kids are gathering but she said no, that she was OK, really and for me not to worry. But I do worry, and before I let her go I told her I love her and that I'm here for her no matter what. She's never alone in this life. I'm her dad, she's my purpose in life. I'm praying for my daughter and her friends and for this young man. I pray that as a parent that I'll be more attuned to what my daughter is experiencing and that she will always feel like she can turn to me when life just seems too hard. We're in this together.
I didn't talk to her about God and that He's there with them as they mourn. Hopefully they will remember that He's their first and best hope. At least they've been taught that. I just pray that it's real right now.
Maybe if there is one good thing that could come out of the young man's death, it's that those who loved him will understand that what he's done to them is not something they would wish on those they love. Life is but a vapor and gone too quickly; but how precious is every soul.
This evening my daughter posted a note to her friend on Facebook. He's not here for her to tell him that she loves him. She's still trying to save him, but barring that, her most heartfelt desire is that he'll find the peace there that he couldn't find here. His friends could use some of that peace too.
I don't know if this young man understood that there was still something worth living for. If he hadn't turned his phone off after that last text, he would have quickly found out that his friends were on their way to help him. Some called 911, some jumped into their cars, and some kept trying to get him back on that phone. They all hoped and prayed they would not be too late. Now they are left with the undeserved feeling that they were too late and had done too little.
I'm certain that most parents of this boy's friends are as horrified as I am; for regardless of how we felt about this young man, we know that his death is affecting our children, and we are afraid for them. We can't understand the hopelessness and depression our children are experiencing. To us, they have their whole lives ahead of them - the chance to go farther and become more than we've accomplished in our lives.
If I could say one thing to my daughter and her friends as they mourn the loss of their friend it would be this: You're not in this life alone, no matter how it might feel at times. You are loved with a passion that would cause any of us to lay down our lives for you. You are the best thing we've ever done - you have inside you the best your mom and dad could offer.
If we've been so blind to not see what you're going through, please forgive us. We might come home exhausted and stressed from trying to make it from one paycheck to the next and not realize that you need us to pay as much attention to you as we do to our jobs. We may have left you at home to be supervised by a television; or if we've watched TV together, we may have only conversed during station breaks. Forgive us.
It is natural to want to place the blame for this young man's death on someone or something: depression, drugs, the education system, the government, the church, the media and televion and video games and unemployment....anywhere but accept our responsibility.
I met this young man briefly one time and don't even recall his appearance. Yet, he was important to my daughter. They were friends. If he was important to her, he should have been more important to me. They rushed to try to save him but were too late. Now they sit together, broken hearted and hurting and alone, and the parents are trying to give them space to grieve. I think that we should be there with our children, letting them know that they are not alone, that they are valued and loved and needed. I called my daughter and asked if I could come over to her friend's house where the kids are gathering but she said no, that she was OK, really and for me not to worry. But I do worry, and before I let her go I told her I love her and that I'm here for her no matter what. She's never alone in this life. I'm her dad, she's my purpose in life. I'm praying for my daughter and her friends and for this young man. I pray that as a parent that I'll be more attuned to what my daughter is experiencing and that she will always feel like she can turn to me when life just seems too hard. We're in this together.
I didn't talk to her about God and that He's there with them as they mourn. Hopefully they will remember that He's their first and best hope. At least they've been taught that. I just pray that it's real right now.
Maybe if there is one good thing that could come out of the young man's death, it's that those who loved him will understand that what he's done to them is not something they would wish on those they love. Life is but a vapor and gone too quickly; but how precious is every soul.
This evening my daughter posted a note to her friend on Facebook. He's not here for her to tell him that she loves him. She's still trying to save him, but barring that, her most heartfelt desire is that he'll find the peace there that he couldn't find here. His friends could use some of that peace too.
Faulty Worldviews
"Thoughts are often lies we tell ourselves". Rick Warren - pastor, Saddleback Church.
Have you ever wondered what the world was coming to, especially with all the bad news you see and read about today? How is it that the citizens of the most powerful, benevolent nation in Earth's history is so completely divided and at odds with itself? How is it that we've strayed so far from the ideals that made America great? How is it that we can't seem to find even one person who has a clue how to fix the problems now facing our nation, and the world? How is it that our neighbors and co-workers define America differently than us? How is it that one Christian can vote Republican and another vote Democrat when the core principles of each party are the opposite of the other?
Rick Warren suggests that all behavior is based on our system of beliefs. We act according to our beliefs. What we think is what we do, even if that act is self-destructive and illogical. Every time we make a decision, at that moment we believe it is the right thing for us. The way we look at problems and determine the solutions to those problems is our worldview. "Your worldview is the set of perspectives, values, and convictions that you believe to be true. It is the foundation of your life." (Rick Warren) Rick goes on to say that not everything we believe is true; that we "pick up false and faulty ideas from culture, friends, parents, books, movies, music, the media, and many other imperfect sources that we're not even aware of."
I've long wondered how a Christian could vote for someone on the Democratic ticket. I'm sure there are Democrats who wonder how a Christian can vote Republican. It's seldom about the candidates themselves, and more about the core principles each party stands for. Could it be, and I think it must be, that neither party is based entirely on truth?
Os Guiness, author of "The Case for Civility; And Why Our Future Depends On It", says that the reason we have faulty worldviews is because we've been taught lies about truth. We're taught that truth is dead, or that there is no such thing as truth; that we're all just accidents, so truth is irrelevant. Even so, what is it that victims of injustice desire the most? "Justice through truth - and if not justice, then at least truth...Without truth there can be no justice and no reconciliation."
Our society has embraced an idea of tolerance and relativism - that says that we affirm that all views are equally valid. America has passed laws, called hate-crimes, should someone vocalize or act in a way that others interpret as judgmental or intolerant.
As a Christian, I choose to believe that the God described in scriptures is real and that the scriptures themselves are true. Jesus said, "You shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free." There is liberty in truth; there is bondage in a faulty worldview. So how do I know what is true?
Besides the truth revealed in the Bible, and in nature, I can also know the truth because it is in my heart (conscience). I know right from wrong. I know that killing babies is wrong, just as I know that ignoring the poor and needy is wrong. I may choose to go along with an abortion for convenience sake, or hold on to my money to feed my own family; but my conscience will tell me I was wrong. But there's another way to know the truth; and that's by comparing my ideas with the way the world really works. Truth conforms to reality; and I can test my worldview by asking the following questions:
1. Where did I come from?
2. Why is the world such a mess?
3. Is there a solution?
4. What is my purpose?
Can Darwinism fully explain where I came from? Some may think so, but where are the intermediate fossiles that link mankind with animals? When has science ever created a new species? What are the odds that so many different life forms would exist, let alone come from one dead source? To me, intelligent design makes far more sense.
And if there is a Creator, then the idea that life is purposeless and nothing matters must give way to the knowledge that God gives all human life sanctity, value, meaning, and purpose.
Our culture rejects the idea of sin, and places the blame for all the world's ills everywhere but upon ourselves. Society teaches us to deny our responsibility for evil. We make excuses for those who commit evil. On the other hand, people ask, "If God is real, then why is there so much evil in the world today?" By implication, if God is sovereign, then every sin calls into doubt God's knowledge of what is best; so all we can do is to live the best way we know how. The problem with this worldview is that we cannot consistently do good. We can do good things, but we can't be good. Try being good and see how long you succeed. The only answer that makes sense is that Christ has overcome sin and that if we'll simply confess that we're incapable of being good (tell the truth), then He will forgive us. If you've ever been forgiven for a wrong you've done to someone else, you know what that freedom feels like.
The world is looking for salvation in all the wrong places: politics, the law, education, pacifism, economics, psychology, etc. If you've done harm to someone at some point, you probably know what guilt feels like. In my life it's spelled GUILT. Guilt has played a big part in my worldview. How does your worldview handle guilt? How can we reconcile all the wrongs every person has ever done so that we can live in a world free of guilt? The only worldview that offers a solution to this is redemption through Christ; first with God, and then in all our relationships. Not that all of our problems will go away; but through grace we can accept God's will for our lives. Because we've received grace, we cannot deny God's grace on others. We must learn to see others as God sees them rather than through our faulty worldviews...which is hard for me because I'm a bigot and I'm getting old and cranky and it's hard for an old dog to change.
Our concepts of freedom, the rule of law, and limited government come from the scriptures. It's how civilized man agrees to limit his own desires for the common good. We consciously or subconsciously desire to be part of something bigger than ourselves because we feel insignificant in the scheme of life. That's not how God views us though. He created us on purpose for a purpose. Our challenge is to discover that purpose and fulfill it. This morning in worship service one of our members commented that he'd 'just like a clue about what that purpose is.' I've often felt that way and fretted about whether I've missed what God wants me to do. As my wife also pointed out this morning, it's not about what God wants me to do, it's about what He wants to do through me. See how there's a difference from that viewpoint?
God called us to fulfill the Great Commmission: To love God with everything we are, and to love others as we love ourselves. Sounds simple, but it's not easy. If you view God as holy and sovereign, then you would probably obey God out of fear. I didn't know how to love God until I read "The Shack" by William P. Young.
I find it hard to like, let alone love, a liberal. If I pray for one, it's more likely to focus on God's wrath upon him than it is God's blessings on him. But a scriptural worldview tells me that every person is important to God, and if that person is important to God as much as I am, then that person ought to be important to me.
Before my pastor went to New Orleans to help families rebuild after Hurricane Katrina destroyed their homes and lives, I was of the opinion that they deserved what they got by ignoring all the warnings to get out ahead of the storm. Then Jimmy went down and worked on the homes of some ladies and those statistics suddenly had names; and because of Jimmy's excellent blogging, those names had faces and they had stories and they had worth. Through Jimmy's eyes, I saw people I cared nothing for as God sees them. That's how I learn to love others as I love myself.
My worldview is not perfect. I'm a fundamental Christian born in the South who loves my country with a passion. I can turn a blind eye to my daughter's faults, and I can ignore the faults of the people I am in relationship with. I can find fault with people who have a different worldview than I have - because I've not walked in their shoes or been forced to make the decisions they've had to make. The only place I can get a worldview that is based on reality is in the scriptures. I can compare my viewpoint with that of God's and if mine is different, then I know mine is the one that is wrong. I believe that scripture is inspired and protected by God, so based on that viewpoint, I choose to believe the nature and person of the God described inside. The only way that I can know God's solution and purpose for my life is to study the scriptures and to let them guide me through this journey.
People that know me probably think that I'm doing a lousy job being what I believe. I agree.
Have you ever wondered what the world was coming to, especially with all the bad news you see and read about today? How is it that the citizens of the most powerful, benevolent nation in Earth's history is so completely divided and at odds with itself? How is it that we've strayed so far from the ideals that made America great? How is it that we can't seem to find even one person who has a clue how to fix the problems now facing our nation, and the world? How is it that our neighbors and co-workers define America differently than us? How is it that one Christian can vote Republican and another vote Democrat when the core principles of each party are the opposite of the other?
Rick Warren suggests that all behavior is based on our system of beliefs. We act according to our beliefs. What we think is what we do, even if that act is self-destructive and illogical. Every time we make a decision, at that moment we believe it is the right thing for us. The way we look at problems and determine the solutions to those problems is our worldview. "Your worldview is the set of perspectives, values, and convictions that you believe to be true. It is the foundation of your life." (Rick Warren) Rick goes on to say that not everything we believe is true; that we "pick up false and faulty ideas from culture, friends, parents, books, movies, music, the media, and many other imperfect sources that we're not even aware of."
I've long wondered how a Christian could vote for someone on the Democratic ticket. I'm sure there are Democrats who wonder how a Christian can vote Republican. It's seldom about the candidates themselves, and more about the core principles each party stands for. Could it be, and I think it must be, that neither party is based entirely on truth?
Os Guiness, author of "The Case for Civility; And Why Our Future Depends On It", says that the reason we have faulty worldviews is because we've been taught lies about truth. We're taught that truth is dead, or that there is no such thing as truth; that we're all just accidents, so truth is irrelevant. Even so, what is it that victims of injustice desire the most? "Justice through truth - and if not justice, then at least truth...Without truth there can be no justice and no reconciliation."
Our society has embraced an idea of tolerance and relativism - that says that we affirm that all views are equally valid. America has passed laws, called hate-crimes, should someone vocalize or act in a way that others interpret as judgmental or intolerant.
As a Christian, I choose to believe that the God described in scriptures is real and that the scriptures themselves are true. Jesus said, "You shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free." There is liberty in truth; there is bondage in a faulty worldview. So how do I know what is true?
Besides the truth revealed in the Bible, and in nature, I can also know the truth because it is in my heart (conscience). I know right from wrong. I know that killing babies is wrong, just as I know that ignoring the poor and needy is wrong. I may choose to go along with an abortion for convenience sake, or hold on to my money to feed my own family; but my conscience will tell me I was wrong. But there's another way to know the truth; and that's by comparing my ideas with the way the world really works. Truth conforms to reality; and I can test my worldview by asking the following questions:
1. Where did I come from?
2. Why is the world such a mess?
3. Is there a solution?
4. What is my purpose?
Can Darwinism fully explain where I came from? Some may think so, but where are the intermediate fossiles that link mankind with animals? When has science ever created a new species? What are the odds that so many different life forms would exist, let alone come from one dead source? To me, intelligent design makes far more sense.
And if there is a Creator, then the idea that life is purposeless and nothing matters must give way to the knowledge that God gives all human life sanctity, value, meaning, and purpose.
Our culture rejects the idea of sin, and places the blame for all the world's ills everywhere but upon ourselves. Society teaches us to deny our responsibility for evil. We make excuses for those who commit evil. On the other hand, people ask, "If God is real, then why is there so much evil in the world today?" By implication, if God is sovereign, then every sin calls into doubt God's knowledge of what is best; so all we can do is to live the best way we know how. The problem with this worldview is that we cannot consistently do good. We can do good things, but we can't be good. Try being good and see how long you succeed. The only answer that makes sense is that Christ has overcome sin and that if we'll simply confess that we're incapable of being good (tell the truth), then He will forgive us. If you've ever been forgiven for a wrong you've done to someone else, you know what that freedom feels like.
The world is looking for salvation in all the wrong places: politics, the law, education, pacifism, economics, psychology, etc. If you've done harm to someone at some point, you probably know what guilt feels like. In my life it's spelled GUILT. Guilt has played a big part in my worldview. How does your worldview handle guilt? How can we reconcile all the wrongs every person has ever done so that we can live in a world free of guilt? The only worldview that offers a solution to this is redemption through Christ; first with God, and then in all our relationships. Not that all of our problems will go away; but through grace we can accept God's will for our lives. Because we've received grace, we cannot deny God's grace on others. We must learn to see others as God sees them rather than through our faulty worldviews...which is hard for me because I'm a bigot and I'm getting old and cranky and it's hard for an old dog to change.
Our concepts of freedom, the rule of law, and limited government come from the scriptures. It's how civilized man agrees to limit his own desires for the common good. We consciously or subconsciously desire to be part of something bigger than ourselves because we feel insignificant in the scheme of life. That's not how God views us though. He created us on purpose for a purpose. Our challenge is to discover that purpose and fulfill it. This morning in worship service one of our members commented that he'd 'just like a clue about what that purpose is.' I've often felt that way and fretted about whether I've missed what God wants me to do. As my wife also pointed out this morning, it's not about what God wants me to do, it's about what He wants to do through me. See how there's a difference from that viewpoint?
God called us to fulfill the Great Commmission: To love God with everything we are, and to love others as we love ourselves. Sounds simple, but it's not easy. If you view God as holy and sovereign, then you would probably obey God out of fear. I didn't know how to love God until I read "The Shack" by William P. Young.
I find it hard to like, let alone love, a liberal. If I pray for one, it's more likely to focus on God's wrath upon him than it is God's blessings on him. But a scriptural worldview tells me that every person is important to God, and if that person is important to God as much as I am, then that person ought to be important to me.
Before my pastor went to New Orleans to help families rebuild after Hurricane Katrina destroyed their homes and lives, I was of the opinion that they deserved what they got by ignoring all the warnings to get out ahead of the storm. Then Jimmy went down and worked on the homes of some ladies and those statistics suddenly had names; and because of Jimmy's excellent blogging, those names had faces and they had stories and they had worth. Through Jimmy's eyes, I saw people I cared nothing for as God sees them. That's how I learn to love others as I love myself.
My worldview is not perfect. I'm a fundamental Christian born in the South who loves my country with a passion. I can turn a blind eye to my daughter's faults, and I can ignore the faults of the people I am in relationship with. I can find fault with people who have a different worldview than I have - because I've not walked in their shoes or been forced to make the decisions they've had to make. The only place I can get a worldview that is based on reality is in the scriptures. I can compare my viewpoint with that of God's and if mine is different, then I know mine is the one that is wrong. I believe that scripture is inspired and protected by God, so based on that viewpoint, I choose to believe the nature and person of the God described inside. The only way that I can know God's solution and purpose for my life is to study the scriptures and to let them guide me through this journey.
People that know me probably think that I'm doing a lousy job being what I believe. I agree.
Is America a Christian Nation?
Recently our President, Barry Obama, made a statement to the international community that America is not a Christian nation. His statement has created much controversy. Here's my opinion:
Barry is correct - America is not a Christian nation. We used to be. Anyone who has read the writings of our Founding Fathers can see the influence that Christianity had on the development of our form of government. John Adams wrote: "We have no government armed with power capable of contending with human passions unbridled by morality and religion. Avarice, ambition, revenge, or gallantry, would break the strongest cords of our Constitution as a whale goes through a net. Our Constitution was made only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other."
I listened this morning to radio talk hosts debate whether America should be a Christian nation or whether there has only been a movement over the last 30-40 years where religion has tried to affect politics. The truth is that the religious right hasn't been trying to assume control over our government, we're just responding to the attempts by 'liberals' to remove God from our government. Christians are simply protecting the freedoms of religion that our founding fathers intended. When I was growing up, my parents lived out their faith in all aspects of their life. It's been my generation that has compromised and apologized and demonized Christianity until the very term no longer stands for morality and goodness and love.
If one can separate his faith from his politics, he has no faith - only a religion. Our character reflects our faith. Perhaps that is the problem. We are a generation of compromisers who are willing to push God aside so that we can live our lives on our own terms. Again, Obama was correct - America is not a Christian nation. If we were, he would not be in office. The faith of our Founding Fathers was evidenced in their character and their vision for America. Conversely, the lack of character and the vision of our leaders today reflect the absence of faith in the God upon whom our nation's principles were founded. And if our elected officials lack the moral and ethical standards of their predecessors, so too have those who sent them to office.
Eighty percent of Americans claim to be Christians, yet over half of American voters voted for a candidate and a party that believes it's OK to murder babies, steal property (imminent domain), impoverish the constituents through taxes and welfare programs (Democrats have succeeded in keeping an entire segment of Americans - through second and third generations - in poverty and indebted to them through various welfare social programs); who want to remove God from our schools, businesses and national monuments...the list goes on. Black ministers stand in their pulpits on Sunday mornings vigorously urging their congregations to vote for a political party to ensure their sustenance rather than relying upon God to provide it. This is not the actions of a people who believe in God. If we believe something, we act accordingly; otherwise it's an opinion subject to whatever circumstance we find ourselves in.
In America today, people who consider themselves Christians are just as likely to commit adultery, become addicted to pornography, abandon their spouses and children, have an abortion, and break the Commandments as much as a person who is not a Christian. I myself have been guilty of choosing my own way over God's way. I'm a product of my culture, and I know that it becomes very hard for others to distinguish my actions from those of a godless person. I have compromised my faith at the altar of 'self' and have been part of America's turn from God. If I have any claim to Christianity, it's that I know I've been wrong; and in knowing the difference between right and wrong I'm fearful for the direction away from God that America is taking. For certain, God has not turned His back on America; America has turned her back on Him.
There is much fault to be laid at the feet of fundamental Christians, of whom I consider myself one. We focus on a God of justice and pay lip service to the God of love. We desire justice more than we desire to serve one another. If we practiced what we preached, fewer Americans would feel compelled to rely upon our government. If we were more willing to care for our fellow man, we would attact people to Christ. If we had real faith when confronted with problems bigger than our ability to solve, we'd not surrender our freedoms to the government in return for their taking responsibility for us, but we'd turn to God who has the heart of the king in His hand.
George Washington wrote: "No people can be bound to acknowledge and adore the invisible hand, which conducts the Affairs of men more than the People of the United States. Every step, by which they have advanced to the character of an independent nation, seems to have been distinguished by some token of providential agency."
(George Washington, First Inaugural Address, April 30, 1789) He went on to say, "The blessed Religion revealed in the word of God will remain an eternal and awful monument to prove that the best Institution may be abused by human depravity; and that they may even, in some instances be made subservient to the vilest purposes. Should, hereafter, those incited by the lust of power and prompted by the Supineness or venality of their Constituents, overleap the known barriers of this Constitution and violate the unalienable rights of humanity: it will only serve to shew, that no compact among men (however provident in its construction and sacred in its ratification) can be pronounced everlasting an inviolable, and if I may so express myself, that no Wall of words, that no mound of parchm[en]t can be so formed as to stand against the sweeping torrent of boundless ambition on the side, aided by the sapping current of corrupted morals on the other." (George Washington, fragments of the Draft First Inaugural Address, April 1789)
Our founders understood human nature far better than we do today. We have everything to lose if we ignore or deny the importance of faith in God in our private lives as well as in our government.
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